You’re An Adult So Start Texting Like It


I had a text conversation today. It was actually a conglomeration of text conversations from several people so that my friends who text like that can pretend that it’s not about them. It’s totally about them. Every goddamn one of them. Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends, and just because they do things that [...]

Texts I’ll Never Get


Sometimes you just have to stop waiting and wishing and instead look at what you have before you, and be satisfied. I’ll never be the wild one that Sia Furler pines after. I’ll never be the one that looks like she was born in a black leather jacket. I’ll never be the one to receive [...]

Texting In Prehistoric Times

Archeological pre-historic human clift paint

Setting: Prehistoric Times,  a.k.a. 1977. Susan, am running ten minutes late to meet u at Leif Garrett concert. Was playing “I Was Made for Dancin’” on my 8-Track and got tangled in the tape. Save my seat!* *message scrawled on scrap of typewriter paper and attached to leg of carrier pigeon, released into the air. [...]

The Subtext of a Text

I hear that familiar bleep sound from my beloved blackberry (don’t hate me) and I find myself reaching into my bra strap while I was rounding the last isle towards the checkout in our local market. Only two people saw me, only one had a smirk. I check it, the phone still warm from its [...]