Halloween Safety Tips For The Geriatric Crowd

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Finding  yourself more this side of the mountain than that, but still grooving on Halloween? Knowing what grooving means and still feeling me? Then I got you covered, babe, and here’s the slim, Jim, on keeping your bad self contained and constrained–despite those advancing years–this Boo-Season. How To Be Safe on All Hallow’s Eve: 1.  [...]

Help Wanted: Family of Three Seeks Grill Master

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Area grill masters are invited to apply this Saturday for an immediate week-ends only open grill position with family of three boys, one mother: all hardy eaters. Cooking entries begin at 11 a.m, and are open to the public, professional or non professional. Trials will begin with simple basic meat entree preparation and food handling [...]

Dear Teens: This’ll Flunk You On The Road Test

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Though it may seem like the end of the world to a teen who flunks his road test, it’s not. It’s a parent’s job to get him back up on that horse, and try again as soon as possible.

Our Kids: The Next Generation*

Child With Laptop by Alan Toniolo de Carvalho

My biggest fear, as a geeky mother, is that in my geekalicious arrogance I will fail to keep up on the latest technologies employed by kids and teens, thus falling dreadfully behind and becoming completely unaware of the dangers lurking in the digital shadows.

Swingerphobia and Other Parental Hazards

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Parenting is scary. Most parents are, on the inside, a quivering mass of semi-irrational fears. My husband is afraid of crossing the street. There’s a name for it: he’s dromophobic. When we cross as a family, it’s a dramatic undertaking involving terse instructions and white knuckles. He insists on holding both children’s hands, being skeptical [...]

Death Wish – And You’re Coming Too

Batavus Personal Delivery Bike

  First off. I’m not having a go at cyclists who transport their kiddies around on the back of their bikes or in those weird tent-like trailers. Honest, I am not. It’s just my personal opinion inspired and fuelled by my own paranoias and overly inflated sense of health & safety. But you’d have to [...]

Idiot Labels: Not Just For Idiots Anymore

Really? I was thinking I could climb the electric lines! Thanks for letting me know!

Last week, I was brushing my teeth because people do that and stuff and I was looking at the new carton the brand-spanking-new toothpaste came in and saw the warning, “Do not swallow.” It got me thinking. Do people eat toothpaste? I mean, my kid does but people other than my kid, do they eat [...]