Walk The Walk

Not me, but it sure could have been with those clothes.

You know how kids sometimes don’t do things when you ask them to? Yeah, I know it’s rare, but every once in a while they just seem to forget when you mentioned that the laundry needed to be put in the dryer after the buzzer went off and the dry clothes need to be folded. [...]

You’re An Adult So Start Texting Like It

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I had a text conversation today. It was actually a conglomeration of text conversations from several people so that my friends who text like that can pretend that it’s not about them. It’s totally about them. Every goddamn one of them. Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends, and just because they do things that [...]

5 Reasons Why I am the Laziest Person Ever

Who us? We never piss or barf.

Sometimes I look around my house and I am astonished at just how lazy I can be. Depending on the number of times I’ve ferried children to taekwondo in a given week, I can be house-lazy to the point of “Hoarders” grossness. Here are five examples of my appalling laziness: 1.  For six months, I [...]

I’m BOASTING, BABY!!!!!

aliza

So, you know how so many people post Facebook status updates the night before the first day of school? “Lunches are packed! Kids in bed! Backpacks ready! Forms filled out! Relaxing with a glass of wine and hubby!” And it’s only 8 p.m.? Some are dear friends of mine – and I hope they still [...]

The A-A-B-B Rule of Life

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A-A-B-B. That 4-letter magic formula will get you to some smart places in life, as good as the A-B-C rule, “Always Be Closing.” A-A-B-B is Avoid, Acceptable, Borrow, or Buy. And we’re not just talking the material world. You can apply A-A-B-B to all areas of your life; people, things, events, situations. You can A-A-B-B [...]

7 Lazy Tricks to Tackle Holiday Baking

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I love the holidays, and I love baking. No lie; I just might have a problem. As much as I love to bake, it can be such a time-suck. Along the way, I’ve found great tricks to make holiday goodies completely kick ass, without much effort. Intrigued? You should be! Boxed is OK! Boxed cookie or [...]

Dinner: One Meal at a Time

linda wendy's

Liberated woman with domestic aspirations: that’s me. Martha Stewart meets Gloria SteinMart. I cook, but can’t bake a cake that doesn’t end up looking like the Little Rascals threw a shoe in and left it to bubble over like a demonic cauldron. I send crumbly brownies to school instead of napkins because I don’t admit [...]

Mothering in the Moments

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My days have become impossibly long and difficult since becoming a single mother. A single mother with no shared custody and little child support. A single mother who has uprooted her children to a new living situation in a new city. A single mother with a child with a behavioral disorder, another with a genetic disorder, and [...]

A Stay at Home Mom’s Guide to Job Security

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When I put my youngest child on the school bus for the first time this year, I had a lump in my throat. Unlike a prison tattoo, the tear in my eye was not permanent. As soon as the big yellow school bus pulled away, I raced to my house, locked the doors and took [...]

Man Vs. Nature, or The Man Who Vacuums His Lawn

shopvac

Nature is so darn messy. There’s rain and mud and twigs and leaves and other weird little things that fall from trees–like those helicoptery seed pods and weird berries and those squiggly green things that look like caterpillars. Nature can get totally out of control! There are people who embrace the chaos of nature. They [...]

You Might Be Out of Shape If…

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Deadlines, due dates, these words are the only language I understand to get things done. Left to my own devices, things get left alone. But, if my back is up against the wall, you’ll see action on my part. Knowing this about me is how I knew I could trick myself into getting in shape. [...]

Parenting Like an Expert

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So today, my friend Chris posted this article from CNN.com called “Stop Being a Micromanaging Mom,” and commented that she is the “anti-helicopter mom.” After reading the article, I was glad to see that I, too, join her in those ranks, and rather than thinking of myself as lazy, I know consider myself a parenting [...]