You’re An Adult So Start Texting Like It


I had a text conversation today. It was actually a conglomeration of text conversations from several people so that my friends who text like that can pretend that it’s not about them. It’s totally about them. Every goddamn one of them. Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends, and just because they do things that [...]

When Your New BFF Doesn’t Know She Wants To Be Your BFF Yet


So, you’ve met this mom at 5:30 a.m. CardioPump, and she’s wicked funny and laughs endearingly with her hand over her mouth when the breast-implants-bought-on-a-girls-roadtrip-to-Mexico nasty neighbor up front hits herself in the face with the hand weights. When you see that your new crush’s travel mug reads, “Yeah. I said it. So What,” you [...]

MU Teen: Overprotective Parents

clock in eye

There are probably a good decent amount of those reading this who can identify with what this article is about. Over. Protective. Parents. Don’t get me wrong here; I love my parents to death! They are my guiding hands in this world, helping me out as I get older. At this age, however, I’m starting [...]

MU Teen: When Your Friend’s Boyfriend is a Jerk


The bounties of knowledge cared to spill some wisdom on me recently–my best friend’s boyfriend deserves the Noble Prize for Jerkiness. He flirts with other girls (and guys), having “come out” to his family recently. They did not react well, as the fanatical Catholics in my area tend to, leading him to seek solace in [...]

My Kids Are The Best. And The Worst.


A friend was feeling bad yesterday morning. She had an epic fight with her three year old because he wouldn’t let her wipe him after pooping. They were late for preschool and she didn’t have time for his shit. Literally. She lost her temper, and after dropping him off at school, she still felt remorse. [...]

MU Teen: BFF?

goodbye scrabble tiles

I know as a teenager the term BFF (Best Friends Forever) gets thrown around a lot, and once it was been said it can be hard to end a friendship with a BFF. But sometimes it is better for both parties for things to end. People change and sometimes friendships need to, as well. I [...]

When the Going Gets Tough, Internet Friends Become Family


I often wonder whether my OB/GYN did a clean enough job of cutting the cord between me and my three sons. Because when they skin their knees, it’s me who winces. When the littlest took a kick to the ankle at soccer last Sunday, it was me who hobbled back to the car. After my [...]

How to Make New Friends After Having Kids

Your new friends should be getting up at sunrise, not staggering home from the bars.

When you become a parent, many of your old friends fade away. Maybe they’re tired of hearing about where Jr. has smeared his poo… or maybe you’re tired of hearing about which corner of the pub they’ve throw up in. It’s somewhat harder making new friends as an adult. It’s not like when you were [...]

The Friends You’ll Meet on the Internet

liz and julia

For years in really, real life, I had to listen  as friends told me the Interwebz people I talked to were not people but screen names. It’s a good thing I never listened because last week I was booby flashed by two of those “not real people” and my partner was insta-jealous. He now 100% believes screen [...]

Puttin’ on the Ritz


Every few months we throw a party, and I alone care how this house looks and smells. Lacking in House Beautiful ambition, I yell at my husband and kids and stomp around brandishing dust cloths, scrub brushes, and wicked-looking gardening tools in the faces of those who impede my work. After days of manic labor to [...]

MU Teen: The Problem with Low Expectations


This past Saturday was my big ole 18th birthday – and with it came my pessimistic attitude about how the day would unfold. First off, I made a trip to visit my boyfriend for the weekend, and as my GPS decided to take me on a completely new route than before – down treacherous hills and [...]

MU Teen: Making People Understand Your Differences


I sit at the long table, coffee cup in one hand, pen in the other. My bag is by my tapping feet. Occasionally I lean forward to jot an important point down. I listen to the staff and to the students. They talk about accessibility and being your own advocate and communicating with professors. I [...]