Maybe you don’t get out much and a friend invites you to an event and you immediately scream “YES I’LL GO!” because you haven’t left the house since you had that weird growth on your foot removed/your baby was born/your mother-in-law came to visit and you are just a tiny bit desperate to go out [...]
I don’t go out to the movies often. If I am lucky enough to secure a sitter, movie-going is about #18 on my list of things I would rather do without children. It is sandwiched between showing up stag to a pap smear and attending an obligatory baby shower. I can count on my fingers [...]
So, if you Googled this to get the lyrics to Common’s song, Misunderstood, sorry. You’re shit out of luck. Don’t get me wrong, you did good to get here, it’s just that I don’t like using adverbs in my title, so my bad there. Because this is a post about lyrics that are commonly misunderstood. [...]
Food. I haz obsession. I pretty much think about food ALL DAY LONG and when I’m eating one meal I’m already thinking about the next. Fortunately, I have the awesomest genes on the planet because I manage to stay in good shape and health. But I often eat like crap. For example, my favorite food? [...]
Working a late swing shift for over 10 years, I often found myself on my lunch break at midnight being seduced by promises of silky hair, a tight tush, and offers of imminent wealth. All I had to do was pick up the phone and commit to a few payments of $19.95 plus shipping and [...]
Most women I know have dieted, are dieting, or plan to diet. I mean, I can’t be the only one that has to lose twenty-five pounds by this Saturday.
Let’s face it–food labels are there for a reason. But when you’ve got three kids yelling at you for cocoa puffs you don’t always have the leisure to read a label. That’s what the marketing companies depend on. Photo Credit
I met Chris at Blissdom when he was starting out as a musician in early 2009. He was incredibly nice and funny and goofy. Yes, he was cute too. Then I had my strokes. My first conference trip was to NYC where I saw Chris. It was so sweet to know that he was encouraging [...]
I don’t claim to have the answer to life, the universe and everything (it’s 42, in case you wanted to know). I just have to say this and get it out in the open because BETTER OUT THAN IN, RIGHT? This morning, my son was browsing the cable menu and came across Tom and Jerry, [...]
I haven’t been to the “free” library in almost two years. Sure I’ve driven past it’s opulent exterior of brick and mortar and longingly thought about its treasure of texts held within. And the buzzing computers and DVDs and micro-film, and the old man that coughs every 30 seconds like he’s about to die. Oh, and the [...]
Setting: Prehistoric Times, a.k.a. 1977. Susan, am running ten minutes late to meet u at Leif Garrett concert. Was playing “I Was Made for Dancin’” on my 8-Track and got tangled in the tape. Save my seat!* *message scrawled on scrap of typewriter paper and attached to leg of carrier pigeon, released into the air. [...]
Kevin Bacon: Bacon Bits. (I mean, duh. This is a no-brainer, like Geiss Cubes on 30 Rock. And having once had breakfast with The Bac, I know he’s a deep thinker.) Humpty Hump: I Once Got Busy in a Burger King Bathroom. (Sells itself.) Barack Obama: Barack The Boat: Paddleboating With POTUS (Is that a [...]
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