Author Archives | Tena
Tena - who has written 26 posts on Aiming Low.
You can find Tena from My Therapy in her journey to discovering what’s next. Recovering “do-it-all” mommy finally realizing that this thankless, breakneck, under paid job of stay at home mom may not be for her after all – just 11 years, 4 kids, loss of youth and firmness and many an identity crisis too late. I’ve served my time keeping up the image of doting soccer mom, chauffeur, room mother, cop’s trophy wife and have come to the realization that perfection is tiring. My kids are all toilet trained, fed, and semi-literate, essentially, my job here is done. I now spend my time watching reality TV and trying to compose a theory for how long it is acceptable in society to go without a shower.
I used to have a crush on her
About ten years ago, I was obsessed with home remodeling shows. It was so 2000, but it was all the rage. Cliche as it was, I enjoyed me some Trading Spaces. I even applied to the show although my neighbor at the time said she wouldn’t do it if Hilde or Doug would be doing her [...]
Continue reading...Dangers of Housework
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
One of my last memories of manually washing my dishes, ended up with me in an ER. No shit. We lived in a quaint Gingerbread 1920’s Tudor style home. Quaint is the word used to describe something that seems fun at first, but upon further inspection, is just a pain in the ass. The hardwood floors were [...]
Continue reading...You never know if someone is a killer or a good samaritan
Monday, January 11, 2010
My husband and I lived together before we were married. I had a son already when I met him, for I was a whore. One Sunday afternoon, my husband needed to attend a convention with a co-worker and offered to drive. Then he remembered that he didn’t renew his license plates and since this was a convention [...]
Continue reading...Or maybe I should just move to the Jersey Shore…
Monday, January 4, 2010
With the New Year upon us, I feel pressure to make resolutions, even if only to break them, like I normally do. But, you see, I’m in a huge rut. A funk. Big fat lull. Emphasis on the big and fat. I’m grossing myself out. Learning that when your pants fall down, epidemically, it’s NOT because they’re too [...]
Continue reading...How to look hot in the winter- my guide to lazy fashion
Monday, December 28, 2009
I love cold weather. However, I don’t love coats. They’re bulky and restricting and the Stay Puff Marshmallow is not a good look for me. It’s 20 degrees here right now and I have to stay warm… what’s a lazy woman to do to stay toasty? My husband says I look like a bag lady during [...]
Continue reading...Wearing pants AKA making Christmas memories
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
I’m lucky I have kids. Otherwise, this Christmas, I would be sulking about my bills. I would never leave my house. I would be wearing my fleece toile pajama pants and men’s hoodie for days on end- using only my dog’s sniffing and humping of my crotch as an indication that it may be time to shower. I would [...]
Continue reading...Instead of the man in the red suit, I’ll be looking for the men in the white coats
Monday, December 14, 2009
I aim low in many categories. Christmas is NOT one of them. I flip the calendar to December and my eyes get twitchy, I have a few bouts of hyperventilation and I may seize a little. The OCD kicks in- big time. I buy too many presents, spend too much money, make too many cookies, and make my house [...]
Continue reading...Fancy Schmancy Printer Review
Saturday, December 12, 2009
First, let me start off by saying that me- Miss Technotard- reviewing something that is on the cutting edge of technology is quite laughable. However, hard as it may be for me to, say, work a phone or a computer, my review will give you Average Joes and Joannas out there a taste of how [...]
Continue reading...Let the Thanksgiving Games Begin
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
My husband and I are competitive people. Thanksgiving is no time to slack off on our principles. (And by principles, I mean, proving that my mom’s Thanksgiving is way better than his mom’s.) While most families will be sitting around a table, holding hands, saying grace and the things that they are grateful for, my husband will [...]
Continue reading...It’s what’s for dinner
Monday, November 16, 2009
I have to admit, I know my way around a kitchen. I didn’t just gain 40 lbs since high school eating California Chicken sandwiches and unlimited steak fries with extra seasoning from Red Robin- although that certainly could have had something to do with it- that shit gets expensive and I like food, so I had to figure [...]
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Thursday, February 4, 2010
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