About OnBlank

Kristina is a type-A lunatic and a culinary klutz. She has many opinions, most of them about bread. She's awesome at setting nachos on fire and drinking beer. This in mind she's the brains at the food blog OnBlank.com. She dabbles in graphic design, self-help writing, bad poetry and working her husband's wood. (No really, he's a fine woodworker. You know, like a carpenter? Sha...buncha perverts.) She live-tweets meltdowns at @onblank and is always trying to keep her cheese from slipping off her cracker.

Do as I say, not as I did

CapsaicinBurns_sm

I’m the first one to admit I don’t know much. But I have learned a couple of stupidly unrelated tips the hard way. Just promise me you’ll file them away until you’re in a similar situation and I promise you’ll have a much nicer time. Trust me. 1. Wear gloves when you handle peppers. Of [...]

A One-Way Ticket to Australia, Please

GMF Health Cover

I am going to be an ex-pat someday. That’s right. I’m going to leave the purple mountain majesties and fruited plains to themselves. Don’t get me wrong, America’s something very special. But I am lusty for change. And I can think of no greater change than to abandon one’s home country for adventures abroad. My [...]

Tax Time: Dos and Don’ts

IRS Form 1040

Gather your receipts, utter some incantations to the Quicken gods, and light aflame a sacrificial 1040. It’s tax time, people. Do: Get a good accountant. In life, you need a good accountant, a good lawyer, and a good dentist. Everything else really can come and go. Even if you think your returns are pretty easy, [...]

Minted.com Giveaway: I Was a Bridezilla Before It Was Cool

wedding invitations on minted.com

Editor’s note: the giveaway winner is announced at the bottom of the post! I was a type-A bride. I didn’t think I was at the time, but I was cleaning out an old closet the other weekend and found my wedding binder. That’s right. WEDDING BINDER. My first solid instinct for wedding planning was a [...]

A Treatise on Geekdom

Live long, and prosper

I am a sci-fi geek. Though I did not always embrace this part of me, deep down, I knew. The Geeks shall inherit the Earth. Or more likely, a similar but significantly better Earth-like planet in Alpha Centauri. I digress. What I’m getting at is it’s okay to love this stuff. Secretly and not-so-secretly, everybody [...]

Home Improvement Store Revelations

Just say "No"

I’ve painted every room in a house, tiled a whole floor, and landscaped four times. Why? I get bored. I have a store credit card. And because these big box stores exist to rope you into totally unnecessary home improvement projects that never, ever end. Yet we keep going back! We must secrete some hormone [...]

An Open Letter to Friends I May Never Meet

Key

We don’t know each other. We don’t come from the same place. We may never see each other in real life, though I hope it doesn’t turn out that way. We could sit over a piece of lemon pound cake and comment on each other’s phone cases and maybe talk about tattoos and trees. Who [...]

What OSHA Warning Signs Really Mean

Warning-Signs-M2532-ba hot

I have worked many jobs. I have vacuumed, filed, sold, repaired, typed and managed. And from the bottom of the totem pole to the top let me tell you: people have to be told. Of rules, of danger…and, well, they have to be told frequently. In fact, it’s generally just easier to order pre-printed, standard [...]

Something Borrowed, Something Blue

rings

Living in Utah, I attend more than my fair share of Bridezilla weddings. Of weddings seemingly designed to test the obedience of the future husband and the patience of all human beings in the county. Of weddings that make the drinkers drink a lot and the non-drinkers, well, also drink a lot. A cousin of [...]

4 Things You Must Do on Valentine’s Day

BlackLace

Valentine’s Day holds a special charm for me. Maybe it’s the wine sales. Or the candy cinnamon-lip-induced pre-diabetic coma. ‘Tis the season, after all. No matter the reason, there are a few things I really look forward to making happen on V-Day and you should too, no matter your relationship status. Dinner For the Newly [...]

Fresh Bread: Just Don’t Screw it Up

Beautiful, glorious, simple-ass bread.

Bread sounds hard. It seems complicated. Like something only our war-time grandmothers could do after milking the cows and before riveting an airplane together. But I assure you: fresh-baked bread is still within our realm. And it is the Aiming Low secret weapon. People go apeshit over fresh-baked bread and the only thing, THE ONLY [...]

4 School Dance Pro Tips

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Oh, the drama of the school dance. The highs, the lows, THE PRESSURE. Trust me on this…it ain’t no big thing. Myth 1.  I only get ONE PROM, so it has to be P E R F E C T You don’t have go all Promzilla with crazy expectations and tremendous expense. Aside from the [...]