I never believed in loving inanimate objects.
Actually, I did used to believe up until last year that things had feelings and thoughts.
But I didn’t believe there was a place in my world for me to love something that didn’t love me back.
Until 3 years ago when my Lappy [...]

Call me crazy (like you already don’t), but I kinda don’t want the whole Internet world of stalkers, perverts, and my BFFs knowing where I am at any given moment. I kind of like to keep the stalkers, crazies, and my BFFs in the dark most of the [...]

Part-time availability for woman or man to clean, maintain, organize, and cook for a household of four.
Must be available at a minimum of 20 hours per week.
Applicant must have an understanding of the expectations put upon him/her by the employer’s mother as the employer was raised in [...]

But then again, you probably don’t live in Orlando and visit Disney World every other weekend like I do.
We consider ourselves lucky to be so close to the Happy Fairy Magicland, but I realize some people who are dead in their hearts see Disney as plastic/phony/cheezy. I get [...]

I’m pretty sure the cause for my lack of monies and my ever-growing FoodBaby belly is due to sheer laziness.
Why, say you, do I finally admit to this?
Because I’m too lazy not to.
There are 1001 excuses I’ve used to explain why we can’t have dinner at home. Here [...]

Since you’re here on the interwebs, you most likely have an avatar. I SO wish I was talking about an Avatar avatar, but I’m talking about the much less exciting teeny square box that contains a picture of your head (see mine over there), a cartoon of your [...]

“Damn. Something around here smells kinda gamey,” I think.
sniffing around (me, not the dogs)

“Not the dogs. It’s the kids,” still thinking.
sniff the kids “Yeah. It’s them.”
Kids leave.
“Damn. Something still smells, and no one but me is ….. wait. It can’t be me. It’s totally my clothes.”
sniff my hands [...]

The first happened in 4th grade when I wasn’t allowed to watch The Cosby Show (pre-VCR, pre-DVR, pre-HULU). My parents dared to keep me from my favorite show.
I showed them.
I had an anxiety attack. As a 9-year-old 4th grader. I can trace my crazy back that far.
They didn’t [...]

I kind of swear that I’m not 12.
But I like things to stay the same. I like things to stay traditional as I see it in my head. If traditions don’t stay the same, puppies bleed from their eyeballs like they were stung by that weird Brazilian spiny [...]

I love my girls more than anything in the world. More than TV, more than the intertubes, more than brownies. That totally says that I love them UH LOT.
My girls are 5 and almost 4 – 18 months apart and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I [...]