My girls are 5 and 7, and suddenly they think the creepy is cool. Lately, it’s been all about the scary stuff. The more you can make them squeal with piss-your-pants terror, the better. Popping up around the corner in the dark or yelling “BOO!” when they least expect it makes their day (or it makes them cry, depending on the hour, and their blood sugar… I am not a mind reader, folks.)
They come by it honestly. I delight in horror films and so does the Big Guy. But my girls’ horror-loving eyes are much bigger than their stomachs. I know this because after Halloween, they both ended up in my bed making claims of ghosts and aliens in their closets. If they’d told me it was coming from my office attic entrance, I might actually have believed them. I mean, yes, I have obviously watched Paranormal Activity and The Exorcist one too many times in my life. It doesn’t help that I am Catholic and we are taught from birth to believe in all that shit. I mean, we base a lot of what we do out of fear of these very things happening. I’m not afraid of vampires because they are not real. But the devil and his minion, come on–I’ve been taught that son-of-a-bitch lurks around every corner.
Anyway, I have this creepy little doorway in my closet that, no matter how many times I shut that door, it is always open. You can try to convince me that it’s the air return from the attic all you want but I won’t believe you. I even bought a lock but I’m too damn afraid to get that close.
In our last house, lights would mysteriously come on in the middle of the night. I blamed the neighbors. It had be some kind of electronic situation. The radio came on. It had to be a timer. I was trying to convince myself there was no creepy stuff taking place in my house, but just in case I did put the nightstand in front of the bedroom door and locked us in (Because it’s common knowledge that paranormal beings can’t come into your bedroom and rip your sheets off if you blockade the door). I went on about my business, suspecting that I was imagining it all… UNTIL I took a photo of my two-year old and saw someone in the photo who didn’t belong there. I’m not one who likes the photo bomb, especially the supernatural kind. I’m not saying that we had a ghost, but I’m saying this blue guy in the photo wasn’t invited and I don’t know any damn Smurfs.
So I’m pretty sure the padlock on the attic door in my office is necessary. Wouldn’t you be afraid that someone might come spider walking out of your attic if you had evidence on film?