Costco Shopping Tips

When I was in my early teens, I liked to shop at Costco with my mother. It ended on the occasion she directed me to fetch a box of panty liners. I didn’t notice the bottom of the box was open so I was completely surprised when all 500 fanned out on the floor in a sea of Rorshach that I’m pretty sure spelled “shame.”

Instead of projecting my embarrassment and anger like a normal teenager on my mother, I decided I hated Costco and mass consumption.  It took needing to feed a family on a budget before I made my peace with Costco.

I still don’t love shopping there, but I have adopted a few tips that make getting in and out a little easier. 

Picture 1 of 8

Avoid weekends and major holidays. My favorite time to go is an hour before closing on Friday night. Who says romance is dead?

Photo Credits: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8 is all me.  No, I was never a roadie for the Indigo Girls.


  1. Myra says:

    I laughed through the whole thing! You are delightfully crazy! Thanks for the tips, especially about the she-devils. They’ve helped me blow my calorie count every time!

    Twitter Name:

  2. the samples get me every time. also, i try not to bring my kids. that way i can eat my costco berry sundae in peace.

    Twitter Name:

  3. Gina says:

    I was just there yesterday! I CAN Not stand the Costco parking lot. It is an accident waiting to happen every single time!

  4. Melaina25 says:

    Great tips but why the need to fall into homophobic stereotypes by inferring a short hair cut= lesbian?

  5. I have BJ’s instead of Costco. But we have the same plastic-hatted ladies with their sumptuous wares.

  6. Sarah says:

    I would like to say, as one of the people who serves the food in the food court, that, at least in my Costco, Tuesday and Wednesday evenings are about the best times to go. Dead quiet.

  7. Kimberly says:

    Lip Explosion.
    Sounds like something a dick head of a boyfriend would buy his girlfriend
    “Yea, yea. It’s the latest chapstick”
    I hate Costco.

Speak Your Mind