9 Excuses You Can Use For Quitting Your New Year’s Resolutions

Have we taught you nothing?

Now that you went against our recommendations, we’re going to have to give you some good excuses to get out of the mess you made. In the interest of full disclosure, you should know: I am not a great annual resolution maker. I think that is a lot of pressure to put on yourself for an entire year. I’m more of a week-long resolution maker. For example, every Sunday I make a mental resolution to cook at home, bring my lunch to work and sleep more. On any given week I’m successful at one to three, but mostly one.

So, because–like I say a lot–we’re all about helping here at Aiming Low, I want to give you a list of excuses you can use to get out of your recent resolutions…

1. “I got a rash.”
2. “I was drunk when I made them.”
3. “I moved back in with my mother.”
4. “I lied.”
5. “That was my friend’s list, not mine.”
6. “I was in a coma.”
7. “I had to puree my dog’s food for digestive issues.”
8. “I backpacked through Europe.”
9. “I lost my smartphone and the app for it.”

I know. I’m a New Year’s resolution buzzkill! But I’m giving you a way out. And admit it, you really wanted a way out. Join me on the dark side of January 1 and quit those resolutions. You’ll be happy you did.

You’re welcome.