Embarrassing Bodies – The Vagina Episode

I’m writing this with slightly damp pants.

It’s not something I’ve talked about before. With anyone. But I’m sure I can’t be the only one with this strange affliction.

Well, almost sure. About 90% certain that this is perfectly normal. Probably. But what if it’s not? What if I am the only one? Or one of 2% of all the world who have a freakishly large *hushed voice* thingy? What if it turns out I am physically deformed, you know, *hushed voice* down there.

The thing is, I’ve just had a bath -I can’t remember this ever being a problem pre kids, and I’m sure it’s the sort of thing I would remember- but it seems that every time I now go for a bath, some of the water goes *hush voice and shifty eyes* you know, up there. And well, sort of stays. Today it stayed up there until I’d got dressed. And then it leaked out all over my pants.

Now don’t get me wrong. It didn’t gush, this isn’t Niagara falls were talking about here. It wasn’t like the Hollywood film version of a woman’s waters breaking, there was no damp spot on the floor, no splash back – I know I’ve had two kids and everything but give me a break – but it is enough to make you uncomfortably aware that you have a wet patch in your knickers.

Am I alone in this? Should I seek out slightly dodgy ‘corrective surgery’ in an eastern European country? Attend anonymous meetings? Hide away in shame? Install some sort of plug pre-bathing?

Am I *looks around furtively and lowers voice* normal?

Photo source: Marcin Wichary