What do You do with a Problem Like Ceiling Mold?

I don’t have an exhaust fan in my master bathroom.

I know. You are riveted. Best. Beginning. Line. Ever. Move over Dickens with your “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”

“I don’t have an exhaust fan” is the new shit.

But I digress. My exhaust fan problem is not just fear that someone will hear me pooping or that my mirror fogs up. No, this is worse.

My ceiling has mold on it.

This is not my ceiling mold. Mine is far less advanced. I mean, it is smarter, but there is less of it.

How do I solve this problem?

Back in the day (see: right before it ran out) I used a bleach spray. It was supposed to be safe on any surface so I would just spray it up there and if I had free time I would wipe it all down. I have no idea if wiping down was a requirement or not, I’m not really a detail person but it seemed to work either way. The problem is that now I can’t find spray bleach anywhere. Safe for all surfaces or otherwise.

I know that I could just leave the door open when I shower, but there are two problems with that. 1) It is December. It gets cold in my bathroom. I require the steam to stay warm when I am wet and naked and 2) If you leave the bathroom door open you don’t get any warning at all when Norman Bates comes in to stab you.

You know what I am taking about. It is either Norman Bates or that guy from Witchboard and while, yes, the mold is more tangible, I will take my chances with some airborne malady before I lose those four extra seconds to grab my razor or a can of shaving cream to defend myself against the shower intruder.

I know I could have a fan installed, but that is expensive and I am saving up to buy a new XBOX.

So tell me internet, how do I do away with this ceiling mold?

About Goon Squad Sarah

Goon Squad Sarah rocks the mic like a vandal.

Sarah can also be found at Sarah and the Goon Squad, Draft Day Suit, That's Right. You Heard Me.,on twitter @goonsquadsarah or yelling at her TV.


  1. kyooty says:

    please for your health and wellness? install the fan then use bleach standard household bleach to remove the mold already there.

  2. Liz says:

    Can’t you just mix bleach with water (see side of bleach bottle for proper ratio) in a spray bottle to make your own (cheap) bleach spray?

  3. IzzyMom says:

    I have no idea what you do for ceiling mold. In fact, I kind of thought you were going to tell me!

    I have a few little spots here and there above my shower and I just spray them with straight bleach out of a generic spray bottle but I hate the smell. Soooo…if you figure it out, lemme know, k?

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  4. Bridgetteciaj says:

    I think you’re on the right track with the bleach. I love bleach, it kills everything. I’m certain it also kills cancer. It just kills you in the process. Kind of a problem. but I digress.

    I know there are special paints that have anti-mold agents (Killz, Kilz?) you can paint to keep the mold at bay. My only concern would be if there was mold growing behind, above or within the walls b/c the problem has been there for a while. If you notice you’re getting sick a lot or have chest problems etc; you might need to do more than bleach.

    Otherwise, why not get a fan for the bathroom – I mean stand up fan you could use in any part of the house, and turn it one once you’re out to pull all the moisture in the room out. I do this in the 2nd bathroom in our house (because nobody uses the fan since it’s so loud it’s kind of irritating). Hope that helps.

  5. BetaDad says:

    Yeah–bleach and water in a spray bottle. Spray it, let it dry, wipe it off. If it’s still discolored, paint the ceiling. Use a semi-gloss paint because you can wipe it dry more easily. International Building Code changed recently so that new houses are required to have an exhaust fan (“fart fan” in contractorspeak) even if you have a window in the bathroom. Because people don’t open their windows when they shower in the winter. I’m sure you open your window when you shower, right? Used to be you only needed one or the other–fan or window. You also are required to have a fan in the laundry room now. In case you were wondering. Wanna know the maximum stair riser height? It’s 7 3/4″. Was 8″ until 2008. Goddamn nanny state.

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  6. mills says:

    Well living in Germany, we had some mold problems. Airing out the best you can will help every time anyone takes a shower. Open the windows in the rest of the house and open the bathroom door, and a fan to help air it out. Also we had no luck cleaning with bleach. The only thing that seemed to work was hydrogen peroxide. Goggles, a microfiber flat mop with hydrogen peroxide, or something with a long handle. The microfiber seemed to help get mold off also. If you can get paint to help make sure it doesn’t come back all the better.

    This is just our experience with bathroom mold.

    Good luck.

  7. mills says:

    You can still steam up the bathroom, but you need to air it out as soon as you are done. We never sprayed the hydrogen peroxide, but wet a cloth and placed it near the spot then rubbed. It cleared up all the brown/black mold off the paint. It seems a lot of people had good luck with bleach except me.

  8. You need to read this… http://bit.ly/br_mold

    And please don’t use bleach. A 50-50 vinegar-water solution is much better.

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  9. Halfpence says:

    And here I just always mop the ceiling with Mr. Clean.

  10. Steve in WV says:

    Peroxy Kling Liquid, AKA – MoldSTAT

    You should be able to buy at Lowes or HomeDepot.

    Safe on sheetrock, finished and unfinished wood, concrete, brick, carpets, fabrics, tile, grout, porcelain, metals, fiberglass and plastic

    No bleach. It uses hydrogen peroxide. Kill the mold first, then paint the ceiling with a mold resistant paint.

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  11. We had ceiling mold like that once, but not because we didn’t have a ceiling fan, it was more because the apartment above us had a bathroom pipe that was leaking down into our walls, and ceiling. When it finally caved in, and the Landlord thought it was a job too big for his Bob the Builder handy man to fix, we moved to the newly renovated mold free apartment across the hall.
    Guess what else had mold? Most of my furniture (the back side, against the walls) all of my pictures, all of our carpets, everything in the storage closet, and all of our winter coats/boots/hats and gloves.
    It was awesome. And by awesome I mean disgusting.

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