The other day I had to make a call while I was driving my toddler son to pre-school. (I was using the blue-tooth/handsfree/thingabob on my GPS device – so everybody can go back to doing their Safety Dance.) My son lives for being in the car. Seriously. We have our route to school mapped out for him to gain the maximum amount of enjoyment of his ride.
So there I am on my super special and important call sounding all brilliant and stuffs when just ahead I see the most fantastic sight ever. In unison my son and I scream with jubilance, “TRACTOR AT WORK!!” And as if nothing had happened I continue with my call. The person on the phone with me obviously couldn’t overlook the moment and let out a laugh, “ha! MOM IN A CAR!”
It made me realize that I had crossed some sort of invisible threshold of parenting – I am now a person that shouts out the obvious. I have Parental Yawps.
Just on the drive to school I scream out whenever I see a: school bus, city bus, motorcycle, firetruck, ambulance, BIG truck, and brace yourself if I see a garbage truck or if I drive us through a tunnel because those get WOO HOOO’s! But here is where I drop to my knees and confess to ya’ll – I now scream this shit even when my son isn’t in the car. And if I am riding in someone else’s car it sometimes takes every ounce of will power to not yawp this stuff out.
Two nights ago I went to a grown up event with another grown up and I got so twitchy on the drive she finally had to ask what was my major malfunction. “In exactly 2 minutes we are going to drive through a tunnel and I don’t know if I can stop myself from screaming while we do it and and and and and…” I expected to be mocked but when we drove through the tunnel I was thrilled that she joined me in screaming, “TUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNEL!” (will yawp in tunnel: put that on your friend check list, people)
It’s not just in the car either – I yawp in the grocery store: CHOCOLATE MILK! COOKIES! Do we even need to discuss how, um, awkward it was when I yelled out FIREMAN and my son wasn’t with me? Aaaaaawkward.
I’m trying to figure out if I need to squelch my yawps or just embrace them and carry them on over to non toddler based exclamations. FREE WIFI! SHOE SALE! NO RING ON THE LEFT HAND!!!
Not saying you do…but if you did…what would you Yawp about?
About Dresden Plaid
I am one of those sad individuals who yawped even before she had children. You know, the only adult at the movie theatre doing the pee pee dance who screams BATHROOM when she sees one. Or the one who sniggers in the grocery line and as the clerk scans the pork chops screams BUTTCHOP (seriously am I the only one that finds it funny that that’s what the scanner displays?)
My husband says it’s part of what endeared me to him but I know he’s secretly happy that I didn’t scream RING! when he proposed. Although after the ceremony I may have engaged in some HUSBAND yawping.
Anyway, I always thought the kids had gotten that from me – nice to know that it works the other way too.
Twitter Name: ReadilyAParent
“Husband Yawping” – Now THAT is some yawping this single lass is very much looking forward to. KNOW WHAT I MEAN??
woooooo!! BUTCHOP!!!!
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
I remember, pre kids, going out to a grown-up dinner with friends. One friend, a mother to a toddler, reached over the table to put her bowl of chips (potato fries) in the centre and asked us all if we wanted a chippy wippy.
Pre-kids I laughed and mocked. Now I probably wouldn’t even notice.
Twitter Name: notefromlapland
ha!!
(although “chippy wippy” would crack me up pre kids or now…)
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
Wow. I totally yawp. All the time. DOG! LEAVES! And of course, the one that trumps everything…PLAAAANE!!!!!
Twitter Name: mamaknowsitall
You have to wonder if that is where “da plane! da plane!” came from…some Hollywood writer yawping it up with their toddlers :)
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
When my daughter was a pre-toddler (i.e., not a tiny baby), I would make these trilling noises with my mouth that she found hysterical. I would do it every time I walked in the room. One day I did it at work. Thankfully the only person in the room was the Admin and she had a baby the same age as mine. She didn’t even give it another thought.
will you do it right now? PLEASE???!! I so want to hear the trilling!!
love it!
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
“Slug bug” is a realitively new game for my kids. It’s hard for me but I do manage not to yell out “RED ONE, classic & convertible – doulble points!” during my commute on the bus.(we don’t actually slug anyone, anymore)
oh the evolution of “slug bug” and “punch buggy”… an entire generation of children without a single bruise on their upper arms.
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
Well, my little one in a car seat, with a 5-point harness, felt her sister in a booster seat, with all the mobility that allows, had a decided advantage in the slugging aspect of the game.
SInce you mentioned punch buggy, I can consider this on topic- when i see a VW, and I am traveling sans kids, I, um, kind of…. Scream PUNCH BUGGY and Punch myself. Is that a little sad?
I only do this under two circumstances…cows and Christmas decorations.
CHRISTMAS PICKLE!!!! WOOOOO!!!
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
I do this all day long. RED LEAF! 2 PUMPKINS ON THE STOOP! PIGEON! ANOTHER PIGEON! BUS! MORE PIGEONS! TAXI! CRAZY LADY WITH NO PANTS SINGING TO HERSELF OHHH OK LET’S JUST CROSS THE STREET, OK YAY! LOOK! MORE PIGEONS!
Twitter Name: nystoopmama
hey- why didn’t you guys stop and say hello to me this morning? Was it the no pants thing?
WOMAN WITH A PRETZEL!!!
Twitter Name: DresdenPlaid
“BEN & JERRY’S FULL FLAVOR NO CALORIES OR FAT ICE CREAM”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I waited my whole life (well, 44 years) to be a Mommy just so I can act silly, yawp and watch cartoons!! Adam has SLUG BUG down pat.
My Yawp is ‘TRUCK’ My son doesnt say truck properly.He says ‘RUCK’ which most people mistake for ‘FUCK’. so my daily one is T T T TRUCK..
Parental Yawps! I love it! So true, and we have weird ones. We have pugs so whenever we see a flat-faced idiot on the street, our whole family yells “PUG!” It’s endearing to a very few.
My poor poor husband did this.
On the way to a business luncheon.
Lunch?
Anyway, he was with a carload of male co workers and in mid sentence he shouts “TRAIN!”
Yup. Yawping.
Twitter Name: gdrpempress
Last month, when i visited your blog i got an error on the mysql server of yours.:.,-.