I’m a first born.
So is my husband.
And so is my daughter.
For four years, we were a house full of first borns.
What does that mean in the grand scheme of things?
Well, first, if God decides to send a Moses themed plague down here, we merry three are going to find ourselves in a heap of trouble.
Second, it means that, well, for our entire childhoods, we were the first. The first to walk, to talk, to use the potty. Our every milestone was documented. Even the most normal of functions (see potty training) were lauded as the most worthy of achievements. While this sounds great on paper, the only people who really recognize the inherent achievement of being a firstborn child are parents, grandparents and aunts and uncles who might be interested.
Unless your grandpa is the CEO of a big company or a king or something, being born first? Not so much of a big deal. All those pictures taken while we smiled on the potty? They were really just a huge build up for what was going to be a stifling reality check once adulthood smacked us in the face.
It is only now when I find myself in the position of being the mother of a second born that I have truly realized the benefits of a child not being born first.
Secondborn… certainly not second loved, but, perhaps less… um… scrutinized?
I am on the phone with my boss.
It is a few minutes before bath time, but we need to talk about something important. I make the call that bath time can wait.
I put FirstBorn and SecondBorn in front of the television.
Don’t you judge me, it was only going to be, like, twenty minutes.
I hear the sound of running water coming from what I realize is the bathroom sink.
I assume FirstBorn has used the bathroom and is washing her hands. Which she always does. Because FirstBorns have an inherent respect for authority and the rules.
So, I keep talking.
About five minutes later, I still hear the water running. That is… odd.
I peek into the family room.
FirstBorn is sitting on the couch watching television and waiting patiently for bath time to get underway as soon as Mama is done with her call because FirstBorn clearly has respect for my authority and is not crazy.
Holy.heck.where.is.SecondBorn?!!
I go the bathroom.
There are no words for what I see there. Okay, maybe some words.
You know what? All I had to do as soon as I stopped taking pictures and laughing like a mad woman was take the kid’s clothes off and put him in the bath. His bath was over in about five minutes.
FirstBorn?
Still on the couch.
I salute you SecondBorns, mad props.
About Faiqa Khan
It’s totally not just you. Both my kids pull that crap!
That is so cute! Just dawned on me that we are a family of 3 first borns … hmmm …
Twitter Name: mummyinprovence
I had my kids 11 years apart, so it’s kind of like having two firsts. Hubs and I are both firsts as well. Although, as far as birth order goes, I don’t think any one of us (in my family) are doing it right. Other than I’m a little bossy.
Those pictures are ADORABLE. I miss my kids being that small.
OMG….Maryam has done this exact things multiple times. There have been times where she has gone through an entire bottle of hand soap all in the name of “all my by self”. Hey, atleast you will get some benefit from his do-it-yourself attitude once he grows up…maybe:-)(ie..laundry, cleaning room):-)
Ah, self-sufficiency at its finest. What a brilliant boy! :) At first I thought being second born meant leeway to get away with things but then I analysed my dad’s terms of endearment for us. My brother is known as ‘shaboo man’ and I’m known as his ‘poopy daughter’. We’re equally beloved jewels in the eyes of my father. Finally, mucho love to my favorite law abiding citizen (N). Thanks for the tag.
there’s a reason why there are specific personality profiles attached to first borns and those after. firstborns tend to be raised by parents who falsely believe that the very future of planet Earth is directly proportional to the wellbeing of their child. second children? they’re the ones to watch out for! we’ve got four children (a 9yo, and triplet 3yos) and are about to have our fifth. i have a bad feeling that child #5 is gonna be the one who wreaks havoc on us!
Twitter Name: johncaveosborne
We second-borns rock. We’re quite independent, mostly because our parents left us with our older siblings to watch us, which, of course, they never do.
Twitter Name: msmegan
Oh, yeah. Us second borns don’t wait around for anyone. Apparently my older sister was an angel before I arrived. I introduced her to the stairs, cabinets and even the pool in the toilet, lol.
Twitter Name: Mommycosm
You understand, right, that according to Kevin Leman, author of Growing Up First Born, your son is a first born as well. He may not be the first born child in your family, but he is the first born son, and therefore might have some first born traits.
He also is the baby (in birth order) which conflicts with the first born personality..
So yeah, good luck.
My baby? (she’s 11) acts like a General.er, uh I mean first born.
Twitter Name: Msbatman