There are two kinds of motion detectors in this world:
- The cool kind
- The kind that leave you pooping in the dark
Guess which kind I encountered recently?
I recently visited the Nintendo America Headquarters in Seattle-ish. I am not allowed to give you specific locations or pictures because that place is more secure than a federal prison. Apparently corporate espionage is a very big concern in the gaming world and I look exactly like a spy.
Clearly.
Anyway, I’m probably risking my life by telling you this, but Nintendo offices are equipped with the coolest motion detectors ever. The lights are controlled by motion sensors instead of switches, automatically turning on when you enter the room. But! They also are designed to stay on as long as anyone is in there. They don’t just detect motion, but also body heat, a la Mission Impossible, so even if you’re sitting very, very still, the lights will stay on.
Cool, right?
The Marriott hotel next to the Seattle airport, on the other hand, is not equipped with the coolest motion sensors ever.
In what I assume is an effort to save money and the environment, the Marriott has installed motion detectors in the bathrooms of their guestrooms. This is, in theory, a brilliant idea because you don’t have to worry about accidentally leaving the bathroom light on all day when you’re out playing tourist. Score one for the environment!
Unfortunately, the lights are set to automatically go off when there is no movement, regardless of whether or not there is still a person in the bathroom sitting still.
You know, like people do when they poop.
And this might not be so bad if the delay was set to longer than oh, say, 90 seconds. Because I know I was not sitting there for longer than that before the lights went out. I am not a long pooper! I swear! I’m efficient!
I am, however, decidedly less efficient when I have to try to poop while continually waving my arms above my head so as not to be deemed Too Still For Lighting.
And that, ladies and gentleman, is the difference between intelligent use of technology and IBS.
You’re welcome.
About Britt Reints
I stayed at a hotel in Brugges Belgium that had a similar feature in the hallways. I thought it was brilliant.
But not so brilliant if it means pooping in the dark with arms awaving!
Is it wrong that I totally laughed out loud at the visual of you waving your arms frantically in the dark? hehe :)
Twitter Name: pgoodness
Hahahaha! That’s happened to me in restaurant bathrooms. It’s completely unnerving the first time it happens because, well, you’re in the dark in a strange bathroom and where the heck is the toilet paper??!! Funny!
Twitter Name: ellemmes
Yeah, our office restrooms have motion detector lights. It’s fine most of the time because enough people are in and out of the restroom to activate the lights, but when I am here very early or very late or on a weekend (remind me again how much I love my meeting prep days, please), it’s possible that I can still be peeing when the lights go out.
Twitter Name: MamaKaren
heh…my “brilliant” energy saving (read: cheap) hubby set our bathroom light on a timer, to turn off a certain amount of time after having been switched on…only problem is, no amount of arm waving will turn them on again; you physically have to flip the switch once again,which naturally, isn’t anywhere near an arm’s length reach away…
Oh my, I just couldn’t stop laughing with the thought of you waving your arms everywhere. Anyway, I feel you. I had this funny experience in our office bathroom. Since it was completely renovated just a month ago, I really didn’t have any idea that they’ve installed motion detectors. I even screamed when the lights turned off automatically. My officemates who were just outside couldn’t stop laughing when they heard me. Oh well, so much for technology!