HP EZPZ: How To Make Costume Ears For Your Pets

You maybe didn’t know this, but if you’re not dressing up your pets, then they just aren’t cute enough. Also, they are finding their lives less fulfilling than they could be, and it’s your fault. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but this is a hard truth best faced head on.

The good news is that you can turn their lives around in just a few easy steps over half an hour with an old sock, a pair of scissors, some tape, and a few pairs of cut out ears. This simple fix works because cats have very small brains.

Step One: Print a picture of the ears of your choice.

For this particular project, I chose bunny ears, human ears, and a big red bow. I pasted all the ear images into one document so that I could print them out using a single sheet of paper, and I printed them out using my HP Photosmart eStation All-in-One Printer series – C510. It prints colours so beautifully that it will please even the most discerning pet.

Cats thrive on this stuff, by the way. What we falsely perceive as demoralizing and humiliating is actually the rich fertilizer that cats use to feed their naturally evil interiors. Nom nom nom.

Step Two: Cut out the ears and make sure to include tabs where you want to attach them to the headband. If it helps, you can draw in tab guidelines beforehand, but I prefer to do this all freestyle.

Step Three: You know those old socks without mates that get shoved to the back of your sock drawer? Now they have a purpose! Cut about a half inch off the open end of the sock to create a headband suitable for a smaller pet. If you have a larger pet, I suppose that you could use some string or a shoelace.

Step Four: Wrap the tabbed ends around the head band and tape them to the backs of the cut out ears with strips of tape. I 100% do not recommend taping the cut out ears to the actual pet in question. PETS AND ADHESIVES DO NOT MIX.

Step Five: Admire your brilliant handiwork.

Step Six: Round up the pets. At this point, they may start to act suspicious, like they’re catching on to a nasty plot. This is actually eager anticipation of their impending life fulfilment.

And, last but not least…

Step Seven: Put all your hard crafting to work and make your pets’ lives more fulfilling!

Your first attempt might prove to need some work, but remember that practice makes perfect. Here’s Lula sporting a giant red bow:

Your second attempt will definitely show some improvement. Onion revelled in his new bunniness. Just look at him revel:

And, as they say, the third time’s a charm. Oskar was thrilled to learn that he looked just like George Doubleya and Princess Leia’s creepy lovechild:

All in all, my first time making costume ears for my cats was a rousing success. Much fun feeding of their naturally evil interiors was had by most, and Onion even took some time to cozy up to his new set of bunny ears afterwards.

Awwwww.

And now it’s your turn. Have at it! If you have a pug sporting a flouncy petunia or an iguana in a Chiquita banana hat, you don’t want the world to miss out on your genius, do you?

Please take a picture of your snookums and leave a link to it in the comments!