Hey, Four-Eyes!

I have worn glasses almost my entire life. I have had expensive glasses, sunglasses, plastic glasses, designer glasses, broken glasses, you name it! I usually go through a pair every other year. I would say it’s because my prescription keeps changing (it does) but in truth, my poor lenses couldn’t take much more. They get some pretty poor treatment, what with being lost, being used as chew toys (babies and dogs love them!), scratched, rained and snowed on, dropped, bent, twisted… you get the picture. I am an official Aiming Low Four-Eyes and you can be, too!

You can be considered an Aiming Low glasses-wearer if you do any of the following:

1. Let your kids play with your glasses. Wait until after they recently finished a sticky treat and you get bonus points!

2. Wipe those precious lenses with anything you have handy, including scratchy jeans or steel wool.

3. Regularly lose your glasses in your home, your purse, your car, and restaurants.

4. Lose your expensive, designer, prescription sunglasses in a lake and don’t realize for hours, making it impossible to find them. Ever.

5. Sometimes failing to wipe the lenses after going out into the rain because they will just get wet again, and the water droplets aren’t impairing your vision that much.

Do you wear glasses? Contacts? Do you wish your glasses had unobtrusive windshield wipers? I do, that would be so convenient! With wiper fluid of course, so I could keep them clean too. I also wish they could somehow transform to be their own carrying and protective case. I always forget to use one. Oh! And a little umbrella would be cool, to keep the rain off in the first place.

I have to wear them on my face all day, they may as well be useful. Preferably with special scanning technology that allows me to definitively answer the eternal question: Boxers or briefs?

About MommyGeek

Caitlin, a.k.a MommyGeek, is a member of the iGeneration. This means she’s super into technology, and when the robots take over the world, will either be one of the first killed (she knows too much) or recruited to help enslave you (she knows too much – and sympathizes with the robots). She runs Rent a Geek Mom web design, and writes documentation, tutorials and works as Support at Headway Themes.

Comments

  1. IzzyMom says:

    For years, I mistreated my glasses…they were the proverbial red-headed stepchild of my contact lenses and my vision correction choice of last resort. My poor parents replaced my glasses more times than I can count. Now that *I* have to buy them, I’m super careful with them!

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  2. Ashley says:

    UGH it’s so annoying when they’re dirty, but I got lazy and stopped wiping droplets/smudges. You post is too funny! Do you miss pairs you’ve had to throw out?

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  3. Laura says:

    I have a tendency to lose my glasses when they’re on my FACE. I can’t see and I freak out wondering where the hell I put them. Then I realize they’re on my face, but grossly dirty.

    I’ve lost more pairs of glasses than I’d like to admit. Now that I, like you, have to buy my own, I buy them online. FOR $8 A PAIR. FRAMES AND LENSES! (zennioptical.com) All you need is your perscription, pick out your frames, click a few boxes and wait 2-ish weeks for them to show up in your mailbox. *Handy lense wiper INCLUDED!*

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  4. Stella B says:

    I wear contacts but it’s been awesome lately because they are the dailies. They are cheap and thin and sometimes rip in half while in my eye. Then I have these VERY uncomfortable pieces of plastic the move their way up in to areas of my eye that I can’t see. I’ve found that a saline wetted q-tip works, but for the love of all that is holy, it’s painful and painstaking and I have 2 toddlers that don’t understand “just a minute, baby, I have something in my eye, I can’t see so no, I can’t help you for a minute until I get this out of my eye because it feels like I’ve poured draino in my eye.” I have now gone through two pairs of glasses that my lovely son didn’t care about till he was two. I’ve super glued them, epoxied, wire tied, you name it and I won’t pay for more glasses. I just deal with the blindness or the one armed glasses and try to remember not to bend over. :/

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