Dear Cecily,
How do you deal w/a 3 year old who ALWAYS announces “me Farhhhted!”(@ the top of her lungs no less) when out in public?
Oh, how fun. I’m not someone that gets offended by public displays of bodily functions. In fact, I only restrain my farts because I know it bothers folks like YOU. I’m a happy farter. Farts are awesome and, as a giant green ogre said, “Better out than in.”
Nonetheless, you probably aren’t the sort of person to fart along with your child to celebrate such an announcement.
I bet I know how this happened: your child farted, made the loud announcement, and whoever was nearby laughed their asses off. Right? Cause that’s what starts it. Kids love making grownups laugh. As long as you aren’t laughing at them. Which is hard not to do. Sometimes they do really funny shit.
Like announce their farts at top volume.
There are two ways to go that I can see. One, you immediately train everyone around your kid to not react in anyway to the announcements. No laughing, no admonishing, nothing. Just ignore it. When she repeats the announcement, you simply say, “Yes, I heard you.” This will stop the behavior pretty quickly.
The other option is to simply change what’s IN the announcement. Try to add, “EXCUSE ME!” to the loud announcement. Eventually, try to wean them out of any statement other than the “EXCUSE ME!” part. Hopefully, over time, she will stop.
The goodness is, this is not a forever problem. When your kid gets older, she will learn that other kids will make fun of her for farting, and therefore she will learn to suppress farts like the rest of us. Something I’ve had to become reacquainted with because I have an in-house job again after four years of stay-at-home-farting. Luckily, the bathroom at the office is just down the hall. Heh.
About Cecily Kellogg
I announce my farts all the time. Especially when we’re in public only I do that differently. If it’s a really loud one, I’m all….”Isaac!” (that’s my kid) and go about my business. I love farting. It feels lovely.
Twitter Name: lotsospermies
I couldn’t agree more.
One of the best things about having kids was getting to blame farts on them.
Any advice on how to get my husband to stop doing the same thing?
Twitter Name: aimeewhitbread
Lost cause. So sorry. :D
we’re trying to train our two year old twins to use the word “tooted” instead of “farted” but it just doesn’t have the same ring to it. . . Good advice!
Twitter Name: lickthefridge
It’s so true; fart IS a great word, one of those that sound like what it represents.
You mean I can’t stop my husband from announcing his farts? What about doing the fart lean in church? I’d REALLY like it if he stopped doing that one…
Twitter Name: LoLately
Keep him home from church?
I’m about to blow up from holding in farts all day at this conference. Sometimes I wish it was polite to just let it rip.
To deny a child the right to announce such an achievement seems so wrong. Perhaps you could go with, “shush, they will all want to do one.”
I can say these things because mine are mostly grown.
Twitter Name: penbleth
Similar story – Years ago, one of our littlest wedding guests announced to me, as I stood there in my white frou frou dress, “I go poopies!” From that point on, that’s how hubby announces such things in the home. As someone else said, yep, a lost cause, LOL!
Twitter Name: sharonkurheg
Sage advice! I love that you are a happy farter. Me too. Hey, pull my finger!
I have a four year old who loves farting so much that he “claims” other people’s farts as well. “That was ME!” Very handy to have around. I’m thinking of renting him out on Craig’s List.
Twitter Name: TheBeardedIris
Papa taught the oldest and the oldest taught the baby to shout it out…now no one can get away with a fart in our house! Plus, they ALL think it is HILARIOUS; I am sooo embarrassed to go anywhere in public with these people! LOL
Twitter Name: omahamama