Top 5 Ways to Get Revenge on a Meanie-Mo Coworker

I am a geek both by day and night – not only do I run a WordPress web design business but I also hold a 9-5 tech job in a corporate office. I am the only woman and the youngest on the team, as well as a mother to two young kids. All that means I am an easy target for someone who wants to be a jerk, which means I get a lot of practice thinking of ways to get revenge.

I won’t ever do anything, but it helps soothe me when I feel grouchy. My husband says this is because I am twisted, but I argue it is part of humanity. Revenge. These might work for you too, take notes!

1. Simply expose him/her for who they truly are. This is the lamest but, if they are jerks, the easiest. Just be sweet but allow the jerk to hang himself. It might take a while and possibly a conversation with the boss, calmly, with concrete examples.
2. Buy this teeny gizmo from ThinkGeek. It’s a tiny gadget that beeps at random intervals. It lasts forever & a day and will drive your coworker absolutely BATTY. Best hidden away from the computer, inside a cube wall or piece of furniture if possible. Ceiling tiles work great too!
3. Hide a small piece of raw chicken in the A/C vent above their desk. Obviously you will need a vent handy. But soon that will smell truly rotten and get him/her gagging. Best in a private office, not a nice trick in a cube environment.
4. Steal their security pass/door key. In my office, a security key is required to get in the side doors and after hours. During business hours you can use the main door but it is a pain in the butt. If you can manage to steal their pass (and let it show up somewhere else in the office a few days later each time) you can annoy the crap out of someone. And possibly make them think they are losing their minds. Bonus!
5. Lock ‘em out. Your office likely has a setup that allows any user to log onto any computer in the office, as long as it’s a company computer. Log off your profile and attempt to log on as the meanie-mo coworker. You don’t need to know the password, just ‘eff it up on purpose at least 5-10 times. That should lock them out of their user account and cause all sorts of havoc later on. Your tech team will probably have to reset the password and if they get work email on their phone, it’ll mess that up too. Rock! If you’re paranoid about getting caught, don’t do it on your machine – do it on theirs during their lunch break or an empty machine at a cubicle somewhere. :)

I’m a bit of a techie so most of my revenge techniques include leveraging technology that my mortal enemy probably doesn’t have a grasp on. I’m sure I could learn a lot from you, though! What should I do when faced with a tech-friendly enemy? What are your revenge techniques?

About MommyGeek

Caitlin, a.k.a MommyGeek, is a member of the iGeneration. This means she’s super into technology, and when the robots take over the world, will either be one of the first killed (she knows too much) or recruited to help enslave you (she knows too much – and sympathizes with the robots). She runs Rent a Geek Mom web design, and writes documentation, tutorials and works as Support at Headway Themes.

Comments

  1. Kris says:

    I love all of these. And I also may or may not have used #5 in the past.

  2. kyooty says:

    #5 would heve my hubbie overworked

  3. IzzyMom says:

    I’ve daydreamed of co-worker revenge. Many times. About many people. Some in the recent past. Unfortunately, the lack of a shared work environment hampers the best meanie co-worker revenge plans. But once, back when email confirmations weren’t needed for every damn thing online, I did manage to get some really nice (but ultimately harmless) revenge on this guy I had some business dealings with that had screwed me over royally. I won’t divulge the details here…just know it was goooood.

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  4. Handful says:

    If all else fails give them the cooties. However, I particularly like the beeper. Reminds me of Poe’s beating heart.

  5. Woah – these are awesome! Love the gizmo and raw meat in the vent. Hmm, I may not end up cooking all of this chicken tonight….

  6. dave says:

    im working with 2 obnoxious ghetto females in the restaurant. they are servers and completely ignorant. i want them both fired they dont deserve to work at this place. they are also very ugly, inside and out.

  7. Fred says:

    You are a huge loser.

    • Sunshine says:

      Hey Fred, You are probably just pissy cuz you know someone is secretly wishing they had access to your vent… WAHHH…why don’t you cry about it saddlebags! Get lost and let the intelligent people talk now….shew shew!! LMAO

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