Dear Cecily,
What do I get my husband Dr. F for Valentine’s day – he HATES V-day and never wants presents. He did pony up and get me ruby earrings for V-day – I found them on a deal site for $18 shipped. So he’ll get ME stuff, but hates the idea for himself.
Sincerely,
Amy
Well, the easy answer here is obvious: sexual favors. Preferably those that you don’t really like doing all that much that are ideal for once-a-year experimentation. But like I said, that’s the easy answer.
More challenging is actually having something in a box you can hand the man on Valentine’s Day. (You could make up one of those coupon books full of sexual favors but, honestly, do you really want to? Cause you just KNOW he’s gonna whip one of those out when you have wicked PMS and would rather cut it off than, well, you know.)
A safe bet is to go for a need rather than a want. Is his wallet falling apart at the seams? Do his socks have holes? Are his shirts for working getting a bit on the frayed side? Men can’t refuse practical gifts. I think that might actually be embedded in the Y chromosone. So you can always look around and see what needs replacing and make that your gift, and if you feel badly, add in a blow job.
The risk of doing this, of course, is that he will then believe that YOU also like practical gifts, and that will be the end of $18 ruby earrings and the start of packets of socks and a spatula set. So this can be dangerous ground to tread on.
Ultimately the best thing to do, in my oh so humble opinion, is to give a gift you can share. Tickets to a show, or a trip somewhere, or something like that because of course it’s a gift to both of you, which leaves him less to argue with. However, you DO have to get tickets to something he actually likes; my husband is nice but he has NO desire to see Dolly Parton in concert, unlike me.
Just saying.
Anyway, good luck. If you get desperate, fall back on the blow job. It’s a fail safe. No man will turn that down.
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About Cecily Kellogg
HA! Why bother shopping? They only want one thing: BLOW JOB.
Twitter Name: thedgoddess
My husband always says “don’t get me anything” so I don’t. Sorry but if he doesn’t want it, it will just stress him out.
Usually I take him at his word, especially since Valentine’s Day is not a big one in our family. But this year I felt like being extrAAAAvagant.
Twitter Name: Amy Moss
I find affirmation goes a long way with my man. Make a list of all the things you love about him in a card. Shower him with affection. You give, you get. This includes blog job reciprocation.
Twitter Name: robinplemmons
Oh, a gift to share is such a good idea!
Twitter Name: mommygeekology
We celebrate Annual Steak and a Blow Job day on February 17.
Well, coincidentally enough, JUST this morning he was telling me that he needs a new belt.
Maybe I’ll do the shared gift for his birthday…
Twitter Name: Amy Moss
That is excellent advice. LOVE IT! :)
Blow jobs FTW!
For our first Valentines Day, I got my, then finance chocolate and she got me a CD. Turns out, she hates chocolate and I despised that band, so I got the candy and she listened to CD in car. Worked out swimmingly.
Twitter Name: Ronald Mattocks
the upside to not having a valentine. …..not having to give a blow job or even consider it