EZPZ Thanksgiving

The holidays are rapidly approaching and that means that some of you out there might be hosting people at your house for the annual dinner & festivities. For the Mrs. Cleaver’s of the world this is no big thing, others have set their main goals accordingly: (1) don’t kill anyone with e.coli and; (2) lets eat the turkey before Lettermen comes on. Last year was my first year hosting a big family holiday and all I’m going to say is: ballpark, knocked out of. While the true Low Aimer (is that a phrase?) will order a turducken and some mashed potatoes from the local grocer, I aim to help those that want to please their picky MIL who will only be happy with a meal made at home, complete with juicy turkey and delectable side dishes. Preferably all hot at the same time.

Thanksgiving = Prior Planning Prevents Poor Performance

• Come up with your menu…..about now. (Seriously). Now over the next few weeks make every single side dish you’ve put on the menu. This just means more deliciousness because you are going to go through all the steps of Aunt Edna’s (in)famous jello salad, Grandma’s much loved sweet potato goo and the always popular green bean casserole & mashed potatoes. This means come the real deal, you are not doing anything for the first time and you know that the chicken scratch at the bottom of the hand written recipe card means sugar not salt and that even though those potatoes are supposed to be done in 15 minutes, they really take 30.
• Do all your grocery shopping at least the weekend before Turkey Day. Lets face it, those Over Prepared Oma’s will snatch up all the pumpkin & sage and leave you choosing between questionable produce and expired buttermilk.
• Start cooking three to four days ahead of time. I like to tackle a different dessert or side dish each evening, slowly filling my fridge with baking dishes filled with mashed potatoes, green bean casserole, pumpkin pie, cheesecake and anything else your family demands. This means that on the actual holiday you have to make the turkey, bake rolls and make gravy – all the side dishes can be set out in the morning (to come up to room temperature) and share the precious oven space while the turkey cools & the gravy is being made. Everything is hot at the same time and you don’t have a mountain of dirty dishes crowding your work space.
• The Southerner in me begs me to remind: stuffing is the bread/meat/spice mix that bakes inside the bird, dressing is the same mix baked in a separate dish. For safety sake I recommend turkey newbies stick with dressing and just throw a sliced up apple & onion inside the turkey for some aromatic flavor. Most stuffing recipes can be adapted to dressing with the addition of a can of low sodium chicken broth.
• Don’t forget the fixings for turkey sandwiches!
• Set the table the night before, it is one less thing to do the day of!

Turkey To-Do’s

• Turkeys take time to thaw out. Like, days and days. Putting it in the fridge on Monday or Tuesday morning ensures you don’t have a halfway frozen bird and that it thaws slowly & safely – poisoning your guests is typically frowned on.
• Don’t forget to take the bag of…parts…out of the inside. And always check: sometimes there are two bags. You’ve been warned.
• Turkeys take about 10 minutes per pound to cook. So do the math- if you want to eat at 3 pm, sticking the bird in the oven at 1:30 probably isn’t going to cut it unless you bought a baby turkey that weighs four pounds. Don’t forget to add in the mandatory No Touching, Let The Turkey Sit 30 minutes after it comes out of the oven. This No Touching time helps keep your turkey juicy and delicious.
• Dark pans & roasting bags speed up the cooking time. By….a lot. My family learned this the hard way as the potatoes were being peeled as the turkey came out of the oven. Adjust accordingly.
• Use a thermometer & take the bird out when the dark thigh meat reaches about 175. Again: food poisoning/frowned upon.

And remember: when in doubt, Honeybaked Ham makes a lovely holiday meal. Just light a few pumpkin candles & no one will know the difference.

Thanks Daisy, for once again, speaking slow enough that we can all, hopefully, make this year’s Thanksgiving EZPZ!