If you don’t know about Poobou, you are truly missing out. She’s a southern girl who is funny as hell. She potty trains, she runs, she listens to Lady Gaga and, ahem, she had an iPad. And if that doesn’t get you pouring through her archives for days, the pictures of her ridiculously cute daughter will. ~~Ali
Yesterday, I didn’t get up early to exercise before work, so I decided to go for a run in the evening. Dave was picking up Catie from daycare, so I thought I’d squeeze in my workout before dinner. The couch-to-5K workout is only 30 minutes, after all. No biggie, right?
So I set off on my usual route. And it was fine. On my second running interval, I came to an intersection – although, “intersection” seems like the wrong word because it’s really just the place where a residential street meets another residential street; it’s not like there are stoplights or traffic involved. But anyway, since there was a street crossing, the sidewalk dips down a bit as it leads to the road, making the sidewalk accessible for wheelchairs, strollers, etc.
And even though I’ve crossed that particular road a thousand times with no issues before, this time I somehow lost my footing, and I went sprawling into the concrete. I was carrying my iPhone (since it has my couch-to-5K app on it), and in my effort to try to save my iPhone, my elbow took most of the force of the fall. I also managed to skin my wrist, one of my knees, and part of my stomach. (Nothing hotter than skinned belly flab, let me tell you.)
It was a pretty epic wipe-out.
I quickly got up and assessed the damage, saw that I was bleeding from more than one place, and I cursed loudly. (Sorry, neighbors!) I turned off the couch-to-5K app and tried to call Dave to tell him to come pick up his bleeding wife on the side of the road. Alas, his cell phone was off and he didn’t answer the home phone. I knew that likely meant that he was playing outside with Catie, so he wouldn’t be able to hear the phone ring. (I found out later, I guessed correctly.)
So, I had to hobble back home – about 3/4 of a mile from the site of my humiliation – dripping blood on the sidewalk the whole way. I’m sure the people who drove past me were horrified.
And you know, I’m FINE. I am. It’s just some cuts and scrapes, and they’ll heal eventually. But I’m just SO ANGRY about it. I’m mad that I had to cut my run short, and I felt like I was just getting started. I’m mad that this means I probably can’t work out for the next few days, and I’d really been enjoying my workouts. I’m mad that all these scrapes will probably continue to sting and keep me from sleeping well at night.
And on that last note – my elbow was really the worst of all of my injuries. We’re talking several square inches of skin missing. (I’d post a picture, but… no. I don’t need to gross y’all out.) And of course, we don’t have any large gauze bandages and medical tape in the house, because, OF COURSE WE DON’T. Our first aid kid is pretty much limited to a tube of Neosporin and some Hello Kitty band-aids. I knew that when I went to bed, my elbow was going to wake me up every time I moved and it brushed against the sheets.
So, since necessity is the mother of invention, I stuck my arm through one of Catie’s Pull-Ups and used it as a makeshift elbow bandage. It totally worked too! Except when Catie saw me this morning, she got all upset and said, “HEY! That’s mine!!” Well, sorry kid, it’s mine now.
Let’s sum up:
* Knee, wrist, stomach: mild scrapes, should recover quickly.
* Elbow: bad scrape, will take some time to get back to 100%.
* Pride, dignity: damaged beyond repair.
* Gracefulness: never had it in the first damn place.
About Aiming Low Does Good
wow that story just confirms my need for the safety of my recliner. on another note, I live in the south, and you are very lucky that none of your nieghbors saw you limping slowly down the sidewalk dripping blood and assumed you were a zombie. cause, yeah then you wouldn’t have been able to post. there’s a big zombie scare going on and you could have been mistaken. thank goodness your ok, well except for the elbow and the pride.
Twitter Name: IamThePeachy1
Well, I’m technically in the mid-South (North Carolina), so we aren’t as scared of zombies up here as down in the Deep South. (I was born & raised in Mississippi, y’all.)
Besides, do zombies normally hobble while carrying iPhones and earbuds? I guess they *could*, but it seems unlikely. That very well might have been what saved my life. Steve Jobs should totally use that in an Apple commercial. “Our products prevent you from being mistaken for a zombie.” You’re welcome, Apple. WHERE’S MY CHECK???
Twitter Name: poobou
This was great! Definitely added to my feed reader. You definitely have a lot in common with this team, i believe Heather at http://thespohrsaremultiplying.com/ has found several uses for her babies diapers in the past few months.
Love the writing…hope you’re not feeling too sore!
Yeah, I definitely thought of Heather when I used the Pull-Up as a bandage! My use wasn’t quite as, um, delicate as hers. But you know, desperate times, desperate measures.
Twitter Name: poobou
Yet another reason to avoid running (unless chased) at all costs.
It’s just too dangerous.
Twitter Name: Dumblond
Oh, now I’m trying to remember which comedian it was who said, “I ran once. To the store. Because I was out of cigarettes.”
And yeah, I had a friend who was all, “This is why you should just use the elliptical at the gym!” Dude, are you KIDDING me? Those things are fatal to people like me with a built-in Klutz Gene!
Twitter Name: poobou
Use aquaphor on all those scrapes. Don’t let them dry out! Scabs are your enemy. Take it from me. I went over the handlebars of my mountain bike and basically took my face off. OFF! Completely gross. But you can hardly tell thanks to aquaphor. Keep it moist.
Also, people passed a bleeding lady stumbling home on the sidewalk, without stopping!? I hope you shouted some profanity at them, because that’s what they deserved.
I’m using Neosporin with pain relief on it all the time because it stings like a mother of pearl (yeah, I have a 3 year-old, I do a lot of curse word substitutions for the tiny ears that hear EVERYTHING). So the Neosporin is keeping it moist. But there is a scab, and it’s horrifying.
I wasn’t surprised that people passed me; that’s what I get for going out for a run at rush hour. People are thinking about getting home and not paying attention. But I was pretty mad at the one car that was slowing down to turn right when I wiped out. That douche saw me fall, but he didn’t even roll down his window to ask if I was ok. Thanks a lot, jerk.
Twitter Name: poobou
Things I learned from today’s PSA…. – do not run. I’d do something stupid like run into a stop sign, or trip over someone’s grass.
Twitter Name: kjnsmom
#1 reason why I don’t exercise: higher rate of injury.
I’m a delicate flower.
Twitter Name: alotofnothing
Awww, honey! I remember hearing about this, but the full detail: owwie!
*gentle hugs*
Twitter Name: Al_Pal