Over the past year, I have met all sorts of new friends. The kinds of friends that I would have given my husband the death stare had he befriended them.
Online friends.
To be fair, I met these girls through blogging. I mean, there’s a whole BlogHer conference thing. It’s not like the people Chris Hansen is accosting have yearly conventions.
Or is that what Comic-Con REALLY is?
Anyway, after many long conversations via Skype, IM, BBM, text messaging and email, a few of the Aiming Low gals are actually coming to LA this weekend.
Two of them – Brittany and Jen – are staying at my house. And, by house, I mean, tiny, tiny dwelling that might have cat hair stuck to the ceiling fan. You may or may not be allowed to flush tampons due to the questionable plumbing. I am not sure, but I think there’s a mouse hiding under the couch. Either that, or it died at some point and is attracting spiders.
I am sure they can NOT wait!
Sooooo…I just thought I should let the girls know the Rules of the House:
1. Pillow fights are required (OK, that’s Laef’s one and only rule).
2. Try not to be hung over. We only have one bathroom. If someone is in there and you are feeling sick, you are fucked. Please try to make it over to the neighbors yard as I don’t allow barfing in the kitchen sink. Sue me.
3. If I make you a Hot Pocket or a Taquito at 3 a.m. you should be gracious. I don’t want to hear about how your fucking tongue is burnt OR how it’s still frozen in the middle. It’s drunk food. Eat it as is.
4. No wrestling. Trust me. Laef will become the Incredible Hulk if you try to wrestle with your drunk friends in the living room.
5. Play with The Sanch. We are lazy and bad parents so the only people who play with him are our visitors.
6. Cats are NOT the other white meat.
7. I will paint your nails. Just go with it. Even if I try to do each one a different color. It’s girl time.
8. We will NOT watch The Bachelor.
9. We will watch Jersey Shore.
10. Bring your A+ game
That’s basically it. Yes, you may be sleeping on a couch or an air mattress, but it will be 75 degrees and sunny!
Clearly you have not watched The Bachelor with ME. I make that shit fun. You’re lucky it won’t be on while we’re there.
@jenbshaw, SO Funny that you had a Bachelor post today! I did watch half of the first one and was DYING. It is just so….I don’t even know how to describe it. Then again, I watch Jersey Shore.
Awww! Have fun!
I have to admit, I’m a little surprised at the nail painting thing.
But not the pillow fight thing:)
@AJ, I don’t know why, but I like painting people’s nails.
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jen, AimingLow. AimingLow said: New Blog Post Visiting Hours: The Rules http://tinyurl.com/yzo4q98 [...]
FRICK I’m jealous.
Twitter Name: alotofnothing
@Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing], We will Skype you!
I noticed that I wasn’t invited. It’s a passport issue isn’t it?(lie to me!) :P
@kyooty, It is TOTALLY a passport thing. :)
@Allison, ok then
I’m coming too.
@Lindsey, We have extra floor space!!
I am in much need of a sleep over…this sounds too good to miss!
Why, oh, why did I have to read this? Now I’m even sadder that i won’t get to meet your awesomeness this weekend. Eat a Hot Pocket (as they ARE one of the 4 food groups) and think of me…
Twitter Name: izzymom