First, let me start off by saying that me- Miss Technotard- reviewing something that is on the cutting edge of technology is quite laughable. However, hard as it may be for me to, say, work a phone or a computer, my review will give you Average Joes and Joannas out there a taste of how a real person can utilize the HP Photosmart Premium Web Printer.

I would have been happy with a hand-me-down refurbished printer since I had been using the excuse that “our printer was broken” for several months to my kids’ teachers… they were starting to catch on to my lack of commitment to their education by not fixing it or buying a new one.  The jig was up.  I had to do something.

Lo and Behold, the opportunity to get my hands on this sexy, multi-tasking beauty became available to me.

(Ignore the coffee with chewed up gum on it)

“Holy hell, I have struck the jackpot,” I thought, as I stared at it in the box in my living room, horrified that I wouldn’t know how to use it!  A week and a couple, few, several xanax later,  I opened the box.

I’m a simple girl.

I use a desktop Dell computer.  I don’t travel with my printer.  I do go to the grocery store.  The bag that the printer was in (I assume is for those of you who need to travel with a printer) IS HUGE and, honestly, I sqeed.  At the bag!   I could put MOST of my groceries in this one reusable bag- or a small child- whatever your pleasure…

I had been told by many know-it-all types, when I got my printer, that I would need to keep all of the cords from my old one because new printers don’t come with the cords (which is totally dumb, by the way).   This one?  Came with a POUCH full of all the cords you would need! Suck on that, know-it-alls!

I did not have a wireless router, so set up for me wasn’t as easy as it should have been from the beginning.  I am pretty sure Heather hired a hit-man to take me out because all of my questions were driving her to drink and she’s pregnant and we can’t have that.   I called HP support to find out that the HP Photosmart Premium Web Printer has its OWN SUPPORT CENTER full of people that know this thing inside and out!  Mary and Paul (yes, I called twice!) were delightful and didn’t laugh at me (much) when I kept explaining that I have no idea what they were telling me to do.  Turns out that my router only had 3 ports and you will need 4 ports to use this printer to its full capacity (and I wasn’t as clueless as I thought I was-shut up.)

I waited a week for my internet provider to come out and hook up the correct modem.  In the meantime, the printer did NOT just sit there and look pretty!  The printer worked beautifully.  My son did his homework and I didn’t have to come up with some lame ass excuse as to why it wasn’t typed.

I printed a few photos and they look just as good, if not better than the printing I have done at Costco- and I didn’t even have to put on pants!

Finally, my cable guy came and BONUS- he looked exactly like Jon Hamm.  So it’s no wonder that he talked me into the wireless router because I couldn’t say no to him, he was purty!

If I had had a wireless router from the get go- ZOINKS!  This would have been SOOO easy to set up!  It was liberating taking those cords and throwing them and it was done in a jiffy!

And now, I could play!

This is a big girl’s printer.  This, coming from the woman who, much like a college student who does all of her laundry at her parent’s house,  I did all of my “grown up work”: copying, scanning, faxing- at my mommy’s house until a month ago- at the age of 37.   I feel like such a grown up.  And? I can scan body parts!

My kids have enjoyed it immensely, too.  My 14 year old son says ”It’s so awesome, it deserves to stay on all the time.”  My girls have played the numerous iCarly crossword puzzles and word searches and all of them have colored enough Princesses, SpongeBob, and Backyardigan’s pictures to cover my refrigerator- hiding fingerprints- all without even TOUCHING the computer or a bottle of Windex!

**This printer was provided by HP for me to test out and review, but the opinions you see here are 100% mine. I mean, who else puts a child in a bag?