Half-assed is better than no ass at all, right?
So, flying in the face of all I think is right and good in the world, I was guilted into some yard work this weekend.
You heard me right.
YARD WORK.
Which, apparently, involves more than just picking up the beer bottles and making sure the lawn guys have a clear path to the weeds grass that needs mowing (which, let’s not even get into the irony that I pay a lawn guy so that I can spend MY Sunday up to my nipples in leaves and pine cones, MEH).
It may have involved a trip to Home Depot for IMPLEMENTS and TOOLS.
And, can I just say, if you’re going to get into a fight with your husband in a store, please choose a store that doesn’t have axes and hatchets at arms reach. FORTHELOVEOFGOD, they need to keep those things behind glass, don’t you think? Tensions can run high here, people!!
So, we got our rakes and hedge clippers and set off for home.
On a normal day, just shopping for the right tools would be enough effort to chalk up the day as a win. Thus, the reason I own a bread maker, TWO brooms and about eighty bottles of Pledge.
But NO. My husband decided that actual work was going to be required.
*shudder*
So, like any good parent, I decided to use my kids as cheap day labor and got THEM rakes too.
We raked…we piled…we trimmed hedges…we bagged…we SWEATED.
It sucked.
And my arms sort of hurt.
I’m typing this with my tongue, as a matter of fact.
And then? We quit to go see a movie.
Leaving the lawn looking like THIS:
Aiming Low: It really is a family effort.
- Why Freecycle Sometimes Sucks
- From LA To New York With Love
- Salty Pleasures
- We Can't Even Get Married Right
- Of Mice and No Men
Supposedly Related Posts (handpicked by monkeys):
Comments
I’m just so happy you didn’t kill your husband. I would have had to leave the store – mos def. Indeed, they should keep all the sharp, stabby, dismembering implements behind locked doors, no?
Grumble Girl´s last blog ..Taming the Goddamned Dreaded Fitted Sheet
Twitter: SillyJaime
I actually like yard work. Maybe it’s because I don’t have to do it… RAKING FTW!
Jaime´s last blog ..Just a “quick” hello.
I love you. That is all.
Oh, except for this. I told my family a long time ago that I’m allergic to grass so that I may be excused from yard work. I’m a fucking genius.
Shauna´s last blog ..This is my post. This is my mom on my post.
Twitter: alimartell
Dude, you trimmed hedges. Oh my god. You are my hero.
ali´s last blog ..Today.
Oh yard work is the bane of my existence. It’s truly the most horrendous thing on the planet. My own personal version hell is raking and bagging leaves for all eternity.
I live in Florida and thus dont’ have to worry *too* much about raking tons of leaves every fall, but when we moved into our house in September, we realized the previous owners raked the leaves that fell into piles and left them to rot and decay and ruin the grass. So, while they could have bagged a couple small bags every year, instead they let us bag 10 years worth of leaves. It was phenomenal. If I had a nickle for every time I told my husband that yard work is the thing I hate most in this world, I could afford to have someone rake them for me.
I feel your pain, sister.
Amanda Austin´s last blog ..Finally Friday
Twitter: alotofnothing
I don’t get the point of raking leaves, seeing as I’ve never had to.
But really, why do you rake them?
Twitter: mommabird2345
Forget the rakes, you should have bought a leaf blower and blown them into the neighbor’s yard. That way you don’t need to bag them up. :)
Why not skip raking and just mow/mulch the leaves back into the soil?
Thats GREAT for your grass and trees and your lawn mower guys can do it. Don’t let them BS you. They only need a mulching mower. I bought one at Lowes for about $150 and its self propelled. Just like a regular mower only no bag!
FYI my can’tbefatherinlaw refuses to mulch his leaves back into his lawn and so now the trees have sucked all the nutrients out of the soil so he now has mud instead of lawn.
Since you have the leaves piled now, make one big pile and wet it down so it decomposes. Have your hubby turn it s few times this winter. In Spring you will have lovely mulch for your beds = high prices stuff you would otherwise pay for! But I warn you mulch pile tech can become addictive!
Have a beer and be of cheer.
D
Oh God, I hate raking. And, Oh God, I love child labor!
secretagentmama´s last blog ..Shadow Play
Let’s hope for no wind!!!
Seriously. I have been raking the same half-assed raked leaves for the past 4 days. Think I would have scooped them into a garbage bag by now. But no… that’s too much work.
Julie´s last blog ..Blog Candy Blowout!!
I love yard work too, cause I can point and say, trim that or cut that or rake that to the yard guy and he does it. Then after he leaves and people drive by and see my yard, I can walk around with a rake in my hands and they think “I” did it! I love yard work!