The honeymoon is over. We survived New York City cabs, subways and pushy street vendors on Canal Street.
We couldn’t have asked for better weather, as it never got too hot or too humid. Of course on the day that I utilized my first “wife” card (you know, the one where you promise a blow job later if you can pretty please walk from Central Park to 73rd Street to see “Carrie Bradshaw’s apartment”) it dumped an assload of rain.
There were people selling $5 umbrellas everywhere, but because our cab driver had told us that these dudes buy handfuls of umbrellas at the Dollar Store for $1 and then sell them for $5, Laef wasn’t having any of it.
By that point, we had given so much of our money away to the city that we just decided to suck it up and get soaked. We were also too cheap to refill our subway card or pay for a cab.
Embracing the city, yo. One raindrop at a time. I totally ruined my cute Steve Madden ballet slipper shoes, but we looked kind of badass. Or stupid. Depends who you ask.
By the last night of our trip we were both thoroughly exhausted and had gone over our budget by at least 18 slices of pizza and 18 $9 Coronas. So, we stayed in the room for a date night.
We were all excited to lie in bed, rest our feet and order something from room service. But, seeing as a salad was $29 and a burger was $27, we opted for a $3.99 bag of New York Sharp Cheddar Kettle chips, a frozen Snickers bar and 6 mini bottles of Absolut Vodka.
Embracing the city, yo. One potato chip at a time.
There were grand illusions of doing sexy things in room 1642 of the Waldorf-Astoria. Things that had certainly NEVER been done before (seriously, has there ever been a Hello Kitty vibrator in the Waldorf?).
However, at approximately 7:35 p.m. EDT on a Friday night in the city that never sleeps, in a room equipped with more pillows than two people could ever need, Laef began to snore.
We were pooped.
Not that we’ve pooped in like five days. Between eating the $2.75 breakfast of eggs, bacon and potatoes at the diner down the street and the 99 cent pizza a few blocks away, we’re having some issues.
But, we dominated the city as best we could. I think I left half a crepe on the 6 train after a late night out and one of our bottles of champagne may have exploded all over Room 1642.
We left our mark.
And it looks like I’ll be making a return trip for BlogHer 2010. I’m considering selling umbrellas to make drinking money. If anyone wants to go into business with me, let me know.
About Anissa Mayhew
Dang. Not the Steve Maddens! Should’ve pulled another ‘wife’ card for a piggyback ride! Sounds like you had fun anyway!
Layla: I was totally trying to play the whole, “well, we saved $30 in cab fare by walking so I should use that towards new shoes…” I’m still trying. :)
I do feel bad about the shoes. There are about 15 pairs of your shoes I would have rather been ruined. Like the 1985 plaid 5-inch stillettos.
You also failed to mention that while I did fall asleep, I woke up, rallied, and went out to get more liquor. At 10:05. When the liqour store closed at 10. And then walked 15 blocks to get a 6-pack of Corona to enjoy the last night of my honeymoon with my new bride. And came back to my new snoring bride. At 10:45 (7:45 PDT). Good to know some things don’t change with marriage.
Dude, I could have given you tons of places to eat!!! I promise for BlogHer ’10 I will pick up all you non city peeps and shuttle you places. Via subway. cuz cabs are expensive. And since I get a text every morning telling me if I need an umbrella (umbrella today. yo. its free. and keeps me from getting soaked) I’ll have you covered.
Twitter Name: roneydapony
OMG you are TOO funny! A day in NYC can knock you on your booty real fast. I always need a pedi when I come home! ROLMAO in regards to your umbrella biz…you could make millions. :P
How cute is Laef’s response?
Also, I was so down for the umbrella business until I realized we could just become hookers and make more money.
Laef would be down, right? Because Scott would be stoked that I’ve found a way to make some extra cash.
It’s not like I’m not already whoring myself out all over SoCal, anyway.
So did you go to 73rd? Because if you did, you discovered that Carrie’s address does not exist. The building is in Greenwich Village, not midtown.
I cannot tell you how many $5 bills I’ve handed over in that city: umbrellas, scarves, pashminas. And all totally worth it.
Twitter Name: msmegan
Um, shouldn’t there be a rule that husbands can’t comment. I totally got called out! Ha.
Molly: Sweet!! The subway system is killer. We got to go all over town for like $2. It was great. We did bring an umbrella, but left it at the hotel that day. Can’t wait to eat more NYC food next year!
Christine: Yes, I am hoping for millions. Seems like it’s easy enough to me.
Kel: Laef might be one of the cutest people in the world. Not that I’m biased or anything. And, he’s totally down with the hooker thing if it means he can quit his job.
Finn: So, I kept walking by the pashminas saying that I was going to go back and get one. And then I forgot. I’m sad about that. And, you are right. There was no “address” on 73rd street..I never could figure out what part of town she was supposed to live in. I guess now I know!!
I love the city, but it is expensive and if it rains, it’s just a mess!!!! Live and learn though……..
I stayed at the Waldorf once. The $21 gin and tonic at the Bull & Bear downstairs should have been the first warning to abandon ship.
Twitter Name: homeanduncool
Nancy: Total mess, but we did learn a lot by the end of the week. :)
Always Home: EXACTLY. I kept wanting to sneak in there for a yummy steak, but once we read the menu, we decided against it…
I’ve been to NYC a few times and on the last trip my husband’s employer paid for his half of our expenses but still…wicked expensive. I guess we better start saving NOW for BlogHer 10, huh?
Congratulations!
Twitter Name: izzymom
We’re moving NOW to NYC to sell those $4 profit umbrellas. GENIUS.
Twitter Name: alotofnothing
Oddly enough, this TOTALLY makes me miss New York even more than I do now. Sigh.
Though, I’ll have to remember to NEVER stay in room 1642 of the Waldorf.
Congrats on the wedding and successful honeymoon!
xoxo
Twitter Name: AMomTwoBoys