When I stumbled upon Aiming Low I was, well, relieved. I love Anissa. I love Janet. Therefore I am sheep.
There was that whole “bad mom” hullabaloo recently. It didn’t resonate with me. Perhaps because of the verbage. I cannot embrace it. There are certain things in parenting that I have incredibly high standards on and so I couldn’t possible embrace that I’m a “Bad Mom.” Although – in definition I am. But Aiming Low? I can embrace. Because MAN I do. But I’m not sure I qualify, because I don’t want to. I have this total June Cleaver thing in my head I want to attain. Except that would require work. And I don’t wanna. There, I said it. I don’t want to do the work.
Both my kids have special needs. This requires regular lab draws, medication, psychiatrists, psychotherapists, cardiologists, pediatricians, IEP’s, occupational therapy, special education, EKG’s, echocardiograms, and my state’s mental health agency. I am ON that shit, man. I am super-advocate-step-off-my-son-mom. Don’t mess with me – I’m together, and can probably quote state statutes to you.
Everything else? Not so much. The bathroom is a bio hazard. Why boys can’t pee in the toilet, I have no idea. But I don’t clean it up. Because I’ll just have to clean it up again tomorrow, and why touch someone else’s pee when I can twitter? I recently stepped in a puddle in the kitchen. I don’t want to know, thank you. It’s 1:30 in the afternoon on a Wednesday, and I’m in PJ’s. Bras are outlawed at my house. I don’t subject the public to that – but why bother at home? There are tumbleweeds of cat hair. I don’t care.
I’m figuring that as long as my children are (relatively) clean, clothed, fed (pop-tarts are SO a food group,) medically sound, and educated, and my marriage is strong, I’m doing all right. Everything else can bite me. Do I qualify for Aiming Low? I don’t know. But I think I found my tribe.
This Three Day Weekend post is brought to you by Michele, who writes brilliantly over at Sparks and Butterflies.
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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
Rock on with quoting statute to advocate for you kid.
And double rock on for letting the rest of the junk slide. My rule is so long children’s services doesn’t come knocking I’m doing all right.
Twitter: MommaIncredible
July 31, 2009 at 9:40 am
Were we seperated at birth? Because, Wednesday, I didn’t get OUT of my pajamas all day. AND…the only reason I got out of them Thursday was because we had dr apppointments and therapy. I’m totally, 100%, ALL FOR—-Aiming Low! :)
Thanks for speaking for the special needs moms too…
Twitter: anissamayhew
July 31, 2009 at 10:37 am
Girl. You said it!! Awesomely and I’d totally marry you.
Anissa,
Well said. Those who nit pick on each and every little bit of their lives and their surroundings miss the true meaning of life. Unfortunately, I learned that the hard way, when my son was diagnosed with cancer. Suddenly, I would much rather sit and play a video game with him than wash the dishes in the sink. Getting him to his doctors appointments (which were like, every day) was more important than the mounds of wash waiting for me in the basement. The most important thing in the WORLD is our children-their health, their love, and their time, because you just never know if they will always be there. So what if you are in your PJ’s in the middle of the afternoon? I’ll bet that your child will kiss you on the cheek and think that you are just as beautiful in your jams-you might as well be wearing an evening dress. Who wants to do all that work when you can just spend that time with the love of your life, your child? If it came down to having a picture perfect house, and a flawless appearance, or having a happy, healthy child-to me, there is no choice. I would do anything to have my son back, and I have learned that important lesson. I am so glad that I spent that time with him and didn’t waste it on needless things.
Twitter: alotofnothing
July 31, 2009 at 2:32 pm
Very powerful and very true. I’m sorry to hear about your son, but I’m glad you figured out what was most important.
Loved the honesty in this. For me, it’s dog hair, and I just make the boy clean his own bathroom now (he’s old enough.) Thank GOD my husband doesn’t have high housecleaning standards; he just loves that I’m happy.
Twitter: thecaffeinatrix
July 31, 2009 at 1:50 pm
Hey Michele! *waves* So nice to see you here and I totallly agree… Aiming Low is not about being a bad parent. It’s about having different priorities :)
Twitter: alotofnothing
July 31, 2009 at 2:27 pm
You have SO found your tribe. We are all good at some things (nurturing/caring for/looking after/advocating for our children) but when it comes to house work, time-management skills, and just general upkeep of ourselves, we Aim Low.
And this – “why touch someone else’s pee when I can twitter?” – should be the mantra of all Aiming Low people.
GREAT post :)
Know what I do? I just go to bed in clothes so that when I get up, voila! I’m dressed and ready for anything! I could answer the door, go to the store, and even be seen by neighbors and no one would ever know that I slept in that outfit. Not jeans or anything, but maybe a soft cotton dress, or a tank top and leggings? And I buy the softest bras I can find… because I sleep in those too. The girls aren’t as perky as they used to be, so I always have to keep them tied up. Even if I sleep braless, I always have to wear one in the daytime because I hate that under-boob sweaty thing that happens .
Twitter: VampireSmitten
August 12, 2009 at 1:40 am
I think I’m home here . LOL